Top 10 desires a woman wants in a man

What Women Want - San Diego relationship Coach Leslie Saul

What Women Really Desire

Okay, honestly, trying to list the top ten things a woman wants in a man can be a little like trying to hold smoke in your hand.  It’s nearly impossible.  Ask a guy, and he’ll tell you one thing.  Ask a woman, and she’ll tell you something else, depending on how she is feeling at the time.

Still, overall there are a number of things that rise to the surface when it comes to the things women desire most in a man.  I would like to offer my list of the top 10 and then you can be the judge for yourself.  Sound fair?  These are not in any particular order.

1. A Man Who is Real

Yep, it turns out women just want a man who doesn’t pretend to be something he is not.  He is comfortable with the person he is, because he has worked hard to become that man.  He is a man who is not intimidated by the qualities he does not possess, but is fully confident in his own abilities and strengths.

2. A Man Who is Transparent

Simply put, he shares his feelings.  Women want to feel like they are a companion: a partner.  Partners lean on each other.  Partners confide in each other.  A woman is not looking for a man who keeps his feelings bottled up.  In fact, she would like for him to open up about his dreams, his fears, and his desires.  When he does, she will respond in kind.  A man doesn’t need to get all weepy or anything, but being transparent about his feelings will help a woman feel more connected, and that is a good thing.

3. A Man Who is Driven

Women want their men to be doers.  They want him to take risks.  They want him to step out and live life aggressively, and at the same time, not take life too seriously.  Women are looking for a man who can fail without feeling like a failure.  They want a man who can take being challenged without feeling betrayed.  He is confident in the direction he wants to go, and he is headed there.  That is a man a woman can walk beside.

4. A Man Who is Steady

This man has the ability to calm fears in others because he exudes confidence and compassion.  He recognizes the things that a woman fears, and does his best to calm those fear.  He is not overly serious, and is not afraid to use a little humor to lighten up a tense moment.

5. A Man Who is Strong

A woman wants a man who is firm in his own strength, and has the ability to help others reach their potential.  Because he is self-aware, he is also able to challenge others, who are timid, to step up and into their own personal strengths.  His confidence is the strength that drives others to succeed.

6. A Man Who Protects

While the image of a knight in shining armor is somewhat outdated, the idea of chivalry is not.  Women admire a man with the strength and ability to protect himself, and one who will step into the gap to protect those who are too weak to defend themselves.

7. A Man Who is Balanced

Women want a complete man.  They want one who can be firm, yielding, hard and soft all at the same time.  They want a man who can stand up to the storm and hold back the wind, and yet hold her hand tenderly when she needs his comfort.  He can’t be all steel, and neither can he be all velvet.  He has the best of both.  He is a man.

8. A Man Who is Faithful

Women desire fidelity.  They want a man who can commit, and then honor that commitment.  Regardless of what you see on television, the majority of women are still looking for that man who will devote his life to her.  Faithfulness is one of the top traits women desire in a man.

9. A Man Who is Good Looking

Okay, I mean c’mon, we all know its true.  While good looks may not be everything, neither are they nothing.  A man doesn’t have to look like George Clooney, but it is nice if he takes care of himself and makes an attempt to stay in shape.

10. A Man Who is Affectionate

Women want to be desired. They want to be romanced.  They want a man who understands what moves her.  They are looking for a man with the desire and passion to be truly affectionate with her.  Yes, she wants sex, but she wants so much more than that.  True affection is high on her priority list.

Well, what do you think of my list?  Do you see anything that you disagree with, or is there something that you think should be added.  What are the top things you desire in a man?  This should be a fun one so please feel free to share your own list, and lets see how close I came!