Last night I was inspired to write…again based on my own experience.  So much so, I spent the majority of the night flipping from side to side and struggling to find the cold spot on the pillow. So here I am up at 4am furiously typing with no thought of proper punctuation or grammar usage (clearly corrected by the time you read this).

Los Angeles Life and Relationship Coach Leslie J Saul: communication is key

My words, “one more time,” as they came slipping off my tongue, passed my lips and into the ears of the listener, (hopefully listening) lingered so long in my brain that I became tormented. The words I have used so many times throughout my life and retrained myself to the “no more, wall of protection,” KNOWING that I was taking great risk in bringing pain and suffering right out of the past and right back into my present and possibly my future. Why would I say that? They have burned me before.

3:30 am aha moment…I found the positive outcome. I close my eyes adjust my pillow, smile and fall off to sleep.

3:55 am: Wide awake. Seriously? Ya gotta be kidding me! The aha moment clearly wasn’t enough for this Aquarian.

We all work so hard knowingly or unknowingly to change our behavior in an effort to bring transformation and change that we sometimes fall back on those old thoughts and beliefs in an effort to protect ourselves from “possible” harm. These are the obstacles in our lives that keep us stuck and unable to move forward at times. The truth is…the words may be the same, but the meaning has changed. If we use the same words with different beliefs and revise the patterns within, we can change EVERYTHING.

If you were born any time prior to 1980 you will recall that our day-to-day lives were much different. Our connections with people relied heavily and primarily in face to face interaction, the telephone or mail (I don’t even know how much a stamp is, that is how long it has been since I mailed anything). Today with technology as it is and growing daily, we disregard intimate connection and for the younger generation, never had the opportunity to experience another way, the importance of all the senses and most importantly the human touch.

I am a dichotomy…for the most part I really value structure and routine and love, love, love how technology enables me to complete 4 tasks at a time, but dislike the disconnect it brings personally. However, I too have fallen under its magical spell and text, email and hide behind its mask when I know no good comes from it. Why? Cognitive dissonance. However, it keeps me focused on a timeline and helps me to achieve my goals. OR DOES IT? This wonderful technology helps me greatly in the business aspect of my life and the personal aspect of YOURS, but certainly not my own!

I speak with clients and they tell me that life seems to be more manageable when they have a project that they can get married to, but then run into obstacles achieving their purpose or passion or hobbies when that project is completed. Why is it that we find it so much easier to micro manage everybody else’s hopes, dreams and possibilities and then seem to struggle completing our own? Is it because we do not wish to face our own struggles or is it because we get more pleasure from the giving of ourselves out of love for what we are great at to help others? Which ‘should it be”? Is it avoidance or congruence? Why do people feel the need to be right rather than happy. We can’t change people…or can we? Through our own personal change and through our own trial and tribulation we gain experience. this experience is always best served by helping others. When we help others, we truly do help ourselves. We learn, we grow, we transform and we learn to live and love again in a manner which we truly seek. We change.  And when we change, the things and people around us change too.

So many times I hear the pain and suffering from people who have loved and lost. They put walls of protection up believing that if that wall of self-protection is up, they can’t get hurt again. They believe that if the wall is up, they can be more cautious or make better choices. Personally, I don’t feel that is always the best plan. In fact, more times often than not, I think it can be the most damaging thing we can do to ourselves. In my humble opinion it puts up a barrier that keeps energy from flowing. Balance is important of course, but in order for balance to maintain it needs positive and negative to survive, a counter balance. If we put up walls in an attempt to block the negative we also disable positive to flow through. A wall is an imaginary thing we put up based on fear. We believe that something positive will come from placing that wall of protection when in fact it is totally negative. We believe based on experience that bad things will happen so we need to shield ourselves. That is fear. What if instead of putting a protection wall up, we put up a love wall. A mental image of what we truly want rather than what we don’t want. We all know based on the law of attraction that what we think about we bring about. If we can condition ourselves to believe in NOTHING but love, we will inevitably draw more and more love to us.

Today rather than do our best to block the negative in our day-to-day routine, let’s try to magnetize the positive. Let us use all the technology that has drawn us away from our natural needs and use it for positive in all areas. Let us communicate, appreciate and validate the people in our lives AND the ones that have not yet been able to touch us or touch them in a positive, loving, transparent, authentic and vulnerable way. Send a love letter or love song to the man or woman in your life, send a sexy text, post something on your friends wall and let them know how much you appreciate something they did for you or offer your assistance to them, even if they may not need it. Today, just for today experience…Let us not hide behind the technology to avoid a conversation, mask our ourselves or runaway from who we were born to be. Communicate, appreciate and validate the people in your life or maybe just a stranger…share this post with others and watch the positive energy multiply. Try it…What’s the worst that can happen, nothing…??? Unlikely…What we put out, comes back to us tenfold. And IF nothing happens…who cares? In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.” -Mother Teresa

Take a leap of faith today and put yourself out there for the world to not only see…BUT feel……..Do it…be vulnerable…”JUST ONE MORE TIME.”  Lets go “Old School”

LOVING IS A GREAT RISK, BUT NOT LOVING IS A GREATER RISK.